It's my party

Don't let others put you down! Sometimes I cannot help but wonder, why do people have to make rude comments about my achievements or decisions? It doesn't really matter how they say it, basically it is a vilification of my work and life choices and it usually happens in front of other people. I find that very insulting and personal offending. I have told them before how I feel, but there is always a new hair in the soup. That person apologizes, but that is it. Sooner or later it will happen again. I don't know why people say hurtful things or why their awareness about this seems to be at point zero.

Actually I am thinking of one particular friend, who does that every now and then, since I know her. It bothers me, but I don't want to be all the time fighting. I have had the conclusion, that maybe she is jealous and this is a way for her to put up with it. But why would she be jealous? What else could it be? Does it simply make her feel better about herself?

I hate to think about the reasons; it takes my time and energie and leads nowhere. I simply decided to share my life a little less with that person. Certain things I am going to keep to myself. If she doesn't know about it, she cannot bash about it. I don't want to end a friendship, 'cause after all, we are friends, but I have to draw a line in order to feel better about myself again and stop thinking about comments. 

I want to focus on my life, on what I want, who I want to be, where I want to go. It is my party and everybody else is a guest. If the guest doesn't like the party or don't know how to behave, him or her is free to leave. I am able to reflect about myself and admit when I screwed things up, but I certainly do not need to be bashed about it! I love myself, or at least I try. Because...the relationship you have with yourself is the most important one.

Lastly I have to think of a quote, which is oh so true. 





"I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best." - Marilyn Monroe.

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